Blog
Taking Care of You First
Family Caregiving is by far the most demanding and complicated responsibility one can experience—the caregiver must be “the jack of all traits yet the master of none.” Feeling inadequate at first and an expert at the end. Family caregiver is a person who provides...
read moreI’m Sorry For Your Loss…
This is the universal phrase we often say and hear when someone dies. It shows you care and opens the door for dialogue. As the griever, you can simply say, “Thank You, I appreciate that.” OR you may like to start a conversation about the person you are missing with...
read moreClichés of Grief – Fumbling How and What to Say
This is probably the most overwhelming part for a supporter. Are there really any words to share with someone who is suffering from the loss of a loved one? Of course, we can come up with what we think are comforting words, but the majority of us fumble on what to say...
read moreDealing with Dead People’s Stuff
One of the most emotional and taxing tasks after the death of a loved one is, “What to do with all their stuff?” Once the family has rifled through everything taking what they want to keep – then what? It can be incredibly overwhelming and time consuming. Rarely, if...
read moreButterflies, Birds and Heart Rocks
Whenever I receive a call from an individual or family that requests my services for a Celebration of Life, a large butterfly swoops right in front of me. It may happen while I am in my office looking out the window, in my car or out walking – anywhere! The first few...
read morePlease Don’t Try to Fix Me
Several months after the sudden death of my 32-year-old husband, the subtle hints from my friends, family and co-workers appeared – suggesting the time had come for me to get out more socially, begin sorting through his personal belongings and find the smile I once...
read moreScale Of 1-10, How Religious?
“On a scale of 1-10; how religious would you like this Celebration of Life?” This is a question I ask each individual or family when we discuss the components of a Celebration of Life. Most often, the answer shouted out is a consensus such as zero, one, five, ten,...
read moreWhat to Do After a Death Occurs
When a death is sudden and unexpected, such as an accident, homicide or suicide – it’s hard to know what to do first. Our brains want to make sense of what happened, put some logic to it and our hearts are shattered with sadness. So many unanswered questions and now...
read moreGraveside Service Before Celebration of Life
In the past, tradition has been to have the Funeral or Celebration of Life first, then have the burial or Graveside Service. Recently, I have seen a flip in this tradition and surprisingly, I like it better. Some families are choosing to have the Burial first, then...
read moreFamily Estrangement at a Funeral
The word “estrangement” is strange in itself, isn’t it? Definition: “Estrangement is the state of being estranged from someone or the length of time for which you are estranged.” When meeting with families after the death of a loved one, I have seen estrangement in...
read moreIt Takes a Village: Transcending Fatherhood
Written by Gretchen Kodanaz. Daughter of Rachel Kodanaz. Gretchen’s natural father passed away when she was 2 years-old. In honor of Father’s Day she wrote this meaningful and heartfelt blog. The first time my adoptive father, Taner, tried to teach me a lesson was...
read moreHer Funeral, Her Way
Although Cheryl had never smoked, she was dying from Lung Cancer. Her only symptom was a nagging cough for years that didn’t seem to go away. She dismissed it until her voice became hoarser and she started losing weight. Cheryl was stunned by the diagnosis from her...
read more